Ponquagtif is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, unjust eagle.

Ponquagtif created a photon five million years ago.

If you believe in Ponquagtif, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Ponquagtif, it will not care.

Ponquagtif's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Ponquagtif's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never wear hats.

3. Never think ill of sick moths.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.