Habnillig Tettibitrat is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, awe-inspiring fish.

Habnillig Tettibitrat created Europe six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Habnillig Tettibitrat, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Habnillig Tettibitrat, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Habnillig Tettibitrat's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Habnillig Tettibitrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never wear purple coats.

4. Habnillig Tettibitrat must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not commit murder.