Farnflatdun is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, loving bear.

Farnflatdun created viruses seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farnflatdun, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Farnflatdun, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Farnflatdun's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Farnflatdun's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a room before entering it.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Worship no other gods but Farnflatdun.