Mapvencet is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, humane wolf.

Mapvencet created time and space seven million years ago.

If you believe in Mapvencet, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Mapvencet, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Mapvencet's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Mapvencet's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Mapvencet.

2. Worship no other gods but Mapvencet.

3. Do not kill sharks.

4. Remain bowed during prayer.

5. Always remove rings before touching copper.