Gofkimarncunwadsascabgem is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, egotistical ant.

Gofkimarncunwadsascabgem created the planet Jupiter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gofkimarncunwadsascabgem, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Gofkimarncunwadsascabgem, it will be very sad.

Gofkimarncunwadsascabgem's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Gofkimarncunwadsascabgem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.