Wodlistfon is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, kind gorilla.

Wodlistfon created time and space nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodlistfon, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wodlistfon, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Wodlistfon's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Wodlistfon's Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Never wear rings.

3. Never speak aloud of names.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not prepare carrots while filled with anger.