Stipcemvid is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, blissful turtle.

Stipcemvid created bats four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stipcemvid, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Stipcemvid, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Stipcemvid's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Stipcemvid's Holy Commandments

1. Stipcemvid loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not dye your hair cyan.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.