Hannuttquagvab is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, caring clam.

Hannuttquagvab created life nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Hannuttquagvab, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hannuttquagvab, it will cry a lot.

Hannuttquagvab's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Hannuttquagvab's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate whales.

3. Always look after injured birds.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in green.

5. Never skip in holy places.