Vonrakab is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, unsympathetic yak.

Vonrakab created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Vonrakab, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vonrakab, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Vonrakab's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Vonrakab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dwarf planets.

2. Never think ill of sick grasshopers.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Always help manatees.

5. Never feed corn to snakes while wearing corsets.