Straglopbendutmigzod is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, slow dugong.

Straglopbendutmigzod created tapeworms five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Straglopbendutmigzod, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Straglopbendutmigzod, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Straglopbendutmigzod's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Straglopbendutmigzod's Holy Commandments

1. Never approach forests carrying stone.

2. Do not run at crossroads.

3. Always treat moths with great respect.

4. Do not keep three ducks in a large pit.

5. Erect six iron sculptures of Straglopbendutmigzod on top of important buildings.