Afhoggun is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, sage fly.

Afhoggun created a charm quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Afhoggun, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Afhoggun, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Afhoggun's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Afhoggun's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Erect a large lead sculpture of Afhoggun on top of all buildings.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching zinc.

4. Learn eight new languages a year.

5. Always share oranges with strangers, but never with sharks.