Armtikgov is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, generous otter.

Armtikgov created tapeworms eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Armtikgov, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Armtikgov, she will jump up and down on your head.

Armtikgov's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Armtikgov's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not kill geese.

4. Always make sure there are no moths in a room before entering it.

5. Armtikgov must be the most important thing in your life.