Zakcepjadlitfligtanquagrutt is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, staggering cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Zakcepjadlitfligtanquagrutt created the universe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakcepjadlitfligtanquagrutt, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Zakcepjadlitfligtanquagrutt, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Zakcepjadlitfligtanquagrutt's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Zakcepjadlitfligtanquagrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

2. You must never eat gooseberries.

3. Remain bowed during prayer.

4. Heed all portents.

5. Shun those given to greed.