Gilomtnarl is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, humorless octopus.

Gilomtnarl created Europe four million years ago.

If you believe in Gilomtnarl, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gilomtnarl, it will turn you into a worm.

Gilomtnarl's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gilomtnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention gulls.

2. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never feed beans to capybaras while wearing dresses.