Flamfobrot is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, pitiless donkey.

Flamfobrot created snails eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamfobrot, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Flamfobrot, he will turn you into a plant.

Flamfobrot's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Flamfobrot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat bread.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

3. Never mention shrews.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Flamfobrot loves squirrels, so they must be respected.