Barnfet is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unselfish ant.

Barnfet created the planet Earth four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Barnfet, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Barnfet, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Barnfet's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Barnfet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep five doves in a large pit.

2. Never wear corsets.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never talk about dark energy near great tits while wearing purple jumpers and balancing seven carbon spheres on your arms.

5. Respect your elders.