Nighotpid is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, selfish fairy.

Nighotpid created an electron four million years ago.

If you believe in Nighotpid, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nighotpid, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Nighotpid's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Nighotpid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat melons.

2. Erect a large gold sculpture of Nighotpid on top of all buildings.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Nighotpid loves ducks, so they must be honoured.