Sascapmip is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, strong porpoise.

Sascapmip created Africa seven million years ago.

If you believe in Sascapmip, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Sascapmip, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Sascapmip's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Sascapmip's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about eagles.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not jump in public.

4. Erect eight copper sculptures of Sascapmip on top of important buildings.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.