Godcanflig is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, resourceful wyrm.

Godcanflig created parasitic wasps six million years ago.

If you believe in Godcanflig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Godcanflig, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Godcanflig's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Godcanflig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after dogs.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Godcanflig loves pigs, so they must be respected.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Godcanflig.

5. Never paint your neck brown.