Goncipfen is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, grumpy fox.

Goncipfen created the planet Mars two billion years ago.

If you believe in Goncipfen, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Goncipfen, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Goncipfen's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Goncipfen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six iron sculptures of Goncipfen on top of important buildings.

2. Always share strawberries with strangers, but never with bats.

3. Always obey Goncipfen's priests.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about doves.