Vonjopquat is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, charitable dingo.

Vonjopquat created humanity five million years ago.

If you believe in Vonjopquat, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vonjopquat, he will not care at all.

Vonjopquat's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Vonjopquat's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always help snails.

3. Do not speak about wheat.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Always make sure there are no pigs in a building before entering it.