Minloophan is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, benevolent porpoise.

Minloophan created Mount Everest eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Minloophan, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Minloophan, he will turn you into a mole.

Minloophan's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Minloophan's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of numbers.

2. Do not take Minloophan's name in vain.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always wear plain hats during rituals.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.