Raknarlvad is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, astonishing goat.

Raknarlvad created humanity seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Raknarlvad, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Raknarlvad, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Raknarlvad's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Raknarlvad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep three horses in a large pit.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not jump in public.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Raknarlvad.