Wabstigkin is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, slow cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Wabstigkin created the Cigar Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Wabstigkin, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Wabstigkin, he will turn you into a worm.

Wabstigkin's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Wabstigkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve scarves.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Do not bounce in public.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never stain your neck with gray.