Hakjan is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, humorless jellyfish.

Hakjan created water five billion years ago.

If you believe in Hakjan, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hakjan, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Hakjan's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Hakjan's Holy Commandments

1. Grasshopers are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never paint your back green.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near gulls while wearing gray jumpers.

5. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.