Stanbigsis is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, happy gerbil.

Stanbigsis created snails two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stanbigsis, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Stanbigsis, it will turn you into a tree.

Stanbigsis' most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Stanbigsis' Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Worship no other gods but Stanbigsis.

3. Never feed lots of turnips to eagles while wearing indigo shirts.

4. Always obey Stanbigsis' priests.

5. Do not eat nuts.