Abladsig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, all-powerful mole.

Abladsig created matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Abladsig, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Abladsig, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Abladsig's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Abladsig's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of secrets.

2. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

4. Do not eat oranges.

5. Never travel toward the east during spring.