Natpigwig is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, witty alligator.

Natpigwig created a charm quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Natpigwig, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Natpigwig, it will turn you into a mole.

Natpigwig's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Natpigwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Always help sick gulls.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching lead.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate horses.

5. Do not sing in public.