Negvigkinlidgepkomfasnell is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, vain finch.

Negvigkinlidgepkomfasnell created time and space four billion years ago.

If you believe in Negvigkinlidgepkomfasnell, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Negvigkinlidgepkomfasnell, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Negvigkinlidgepkomfasnell's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Negvigkinlidgepkomfasnell's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Learn nine new languages a year.

4. Never talk about gravity near moths while wearing pink shorts and balancing three silicon spheres on your chest.

5. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.