Japgoddid is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, idiotic owl.

Japgoddid created Europe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Japgoddid, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Japgoddid, it will laugh at you.

Japgoddid's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Japgoddid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not count beyond six during ceremonies.

2. Never allow voles to sleep beneath your roof.

3. You must love Japgoddid.

4. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

5. Do not record names concerning asteroids.