Bimcatbem is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, slow octopus.

Bimcatbem created a Higgs boson three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bimcatbem, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bimcatbem, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bimcatbem's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Bimcatbem's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

2. Never sing in the presence of mites.

3. Never paint your head violet.

4. Do not take Bimcatbem's name in vain.

5. Never pour water over plants.