Bagraklarg is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, resourceful dugong.

Bagraklarg created the world five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagraklarg, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bagraklarg, he will be very unhappy.

Bagraklarg's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Bagraklarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chromosomes.

2. Do not wear nickel on your body.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Put Bagraklarg first in all things.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.