Cathuntin is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, blissful squirrel.

Cathuntin created the planet Jupiter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Cathuntin, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cathuntin, he will manifest in front of you.

Cathuntin's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Cathuntin's Holy Commandments

1. Cathuntin loves rats, so they must be honoured.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not consume onions at dawn.

4. Never remain prostrate during dusk.

5. Do not step barefoot upon white earth.