Godtompomzak is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, tiresome jackal.

Godtompomzak created matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Godtompomzak, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Godtompomzak, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Godtompomzak's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Godtompomzak's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics near pigs while wearing orange rings and balancing six iron spheres on your back.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Godtompomzak.

4. You must love Godtompomzak.

5. Do not make images of living things.