Quamzenlad Baddudfot is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, flying slug.

Quamzenlad Baddudfot created Asia four billion years ago.

If you believe in Quamzenlad Baddudfot, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Quamzenlad Baddudfot, it will turn you into a snail.

Quamzenlad Baddudfot's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Quamzenlad Baddudfot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare apples while filled with envy.

2. Never wear black kilts.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

5. Never write about fluid mechanics.