Fitquaftad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, almighty alligator.

Fitquaftad created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fitquaftad, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fitquaftad, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Fitquaftad's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Fitquaftad's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never talk about optics near porpoises while wearing blue scarves and balancing nine gold spheres on your arms.

3. Never think ill of sick tapirs.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Fitquaftad must be the most important thing in your life.