Fumbutxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, pitiless swan.

Fumbutxuck created a strange quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fumbutxuck, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fumbutxuck, he will laugh at you.

Fumbutxuck's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Fumbutxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle aluminium while unclean.

2. Do not travel during summer.

3. Do not turn your face toward north.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never talk about dolphins.