Pidhatsat is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, overgenerous newt.

Pidhatsat created Europe three million years ago.

If you believe in Pidhatsat, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Pidhatsat, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Pidhatsat's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Pidhatsat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

2. Never think about nebulae.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always pray immersed in water.