Wapmildid is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, thoughtless yak.

Wapmildid created humankind two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapmildid, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Wapmildid, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Wapmildid's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Wapmildid's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from gray mites, for they are unholy.

2. Never talk about black holes.

3. Do not kill mice.

4. Do not speak about wheat.

5. Never write about dark energy.