Homfetfem is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, ruthless fox.

Homfetfem created the universe two billion years ago.

If you believe in Homfetfem, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Homfetfem, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Homfetfem's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Homfetfem's Holy Commandments

1. Always help otters.

2. Do not keep five tortoises in a large pit.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never go into black rooms.