Vanjadflan is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, humorless badger.

Vanjadflan created a quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanjadflan, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Vanjadflan, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Vanjadflan's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Vanjadflan's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never feed lots of parsnips to dogs while wearing indigo corsets.

4. Never mark doors with black.

5. Vanjadflan must be the most important thing in your life.