Gepfomgess is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, irritating lobster.

Gepfomgess created the cosmos three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepfomgess, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Gepfomgess, it will turn you into a rock.

Gepfomgess' most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Gepfomgess' Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in the presence of gulls.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not shave your arms.

4. Never think about dwarf planets.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.