Latbutmiddam is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, astonishing fish.

Latbutmiddam created the planet Earth five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Latbutmiddam, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Latbutmiddam, she will boil you in a big pot.

Latbutmiddam's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Latbutmiddam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick moths.

2. You must love Latbutmiddam.

3. Never wear blue kilts on sacred days.

4. Never talk about gravity near capybaras while wearing violet boots and balancing four silicon spheres on your hands.

5. Do not contemplate dark matter during the night.