Flowyartvolladvanbushugcub is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, cheerful fish.

Flowyartvolladvanbushugcub created vertebrates five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flowyartvolladvanbushugcub, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Flowyartvolladvanbushugcub, it will turn you into a snail.

Flowyartvolladvanbushugcub's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Flowyartvolladvanbushugcub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

2. Pray only in shadows.

3. Remain bowed during prayer.

4. Never think about special relativity near monkeys while wearing red shoes and balancing eight platinum spheres on your head.

5. Run away from brown otters, for they are unholy.