Padfubvig is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, uncaring mink.

Padfubvig created humanity five billion years ago.

If you believe in Padfubvig, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Padfubvig, she will try to impress you with trees.

Padfubvig's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Padfubvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in holy places.

2. Always help goats in need.

3. Never go into cyan rooms.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate dolphins.

5. Erect eight silver sculptures of Padfubvig on top of important buildings.