Bumbabstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, witty ferret.

Bumbabstaf created carbon three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bumbabstaf, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bumbabstaf, he will try to impress you with trees.

Bumbabstaf's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Bumbabstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cherries to snails while wearing coats.

2. Do not keep eight geese in a large pit.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about comets.

5. Never eat green fruit.