Mattiktailsand is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, quiet capybara.

Mattiktailsand created the Black Eye Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mattiktailsand, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Mattiktailsand, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Mattiktailsand's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Mattiktailsand's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Never speak of balance in the presence of elders.

4. Never pray while filled with anger.

5. Never tolerate songs in holy places.