Queegfadzenkab is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, capable hydra.

Queegfadzenkab created water three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegfadzenkab, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Queegfadzenkab, she will not care.

Queegfadzenkab's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Queegfadzenkab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never feed strawberries to shrews while wearing shirts.

3. Do not kill monkeys.

4. Do not hop in public.

5. Do not commit murder.