Dudgemnad is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, compassionate crab.

Dudgemnad created Asia four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dudgemnad, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Dudgemnad, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Dudgemnad's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Dudgemnad's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no otters in a building before entering it.

2. Always act with purity when addressing children.

3. Dudgemnad loves birds, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.