Dussfutbag Lablappograp is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, able mouse.

Dussfutbag Lablappograp created a down quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Dussfutbag Lablappograp, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Dussfutbag Lablappograp, she will turn you into a sheep.

Dussfutbag Lablappograp's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Dussfutbag Lablappograp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in black rooms.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never eat peanuts.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Dussfutbag Lablappograp.