Arnjapfed is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, thoughtless fish.

Arnjapfed created the Cigar Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arnjapfed, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Arnjapfed, he will try to impress you with trees.

Arnjapfed's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Arnjapfed's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Never write about optics.

3. Always obey Arnjapfed's priests.

4. Retreat if seven badgers approach from the west.

5. Do not stand on grass.